Thursday, January 10, 2013

Welcome to 2013: Bling and a Bomb

Many women likely received expensive jewelry this holiday season, most ostensibly from their husband or lover. My husband gave me kitchen stuff for Christmas, but don't worry, I still got the bling. Just not exactly the kind of bling one wishes for.

Last week I learned that my resting heart rate is about 40. A normal person should be between 60-105. Doctors do see heart rates in the 40s and 50s in Olympic athletes, which quite clearly I am NOT, despite what you might assume after seeing this shirtless hardbody. So they blinged me out and sent me home for 48 hours to decide if I need....

wait for it...

....a PACEMAKER.

What the fuckety fuck!?

My body is on strike. It won't absorb vitamins, I stutter, my brain doesn't do what it's supposed to, my muscles host their own dance parties that I'm not invited to, and now my heart's getting in on the action.

This post is entitled Bling and a Bomb. The bling refers to my new accoutrements. The bomb refers to the news I just got - NOT to my heart, I hope, please and thank you very much.

To make 2013 even cheerier, I got sacked.

Now to be fair, I realize a company can't hold a job indefinitely hoping someone stops being retarded and starts being a marketing manager again.

But wow. Losing insurance will just be the whipped cream on the disaster sundae. I'm sure I'll have no trouble getting new insurance. Who doesn't want to insure a walking catastrophe?

It's been said that when a door closes a window opens. I can't find the window right now. If anyone sees one, push me out of it, please.

7 comments:

  1. So sorry to hear, Trish. I can relate - I've had some health issues in the past that took a long to recover from. And lost insurance last year only to get new insurance that sucks, but at least I am covered since I had to have another surgery a month ago. Had to pay out the nose though...
    This too will pass and things will turn around. Keep up the spirits :-)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh my....

    2013 is turning out to be a seriously rotten year for us then, my daughter was diagnosed with a tumor on December 31st, and you just keep piling up different symptoms....
    Maybe it's for the best that we can't find the window, we might be tempted to jump :-(

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh my....

    2013 is turning out to be a seriously rotten year for us then, my daughter was diagnosed with a tumor on December 31st, and you just keep piling up different symptoms....
    Maybe it's for the best that we can't find the window, we might be tempted to jump :-(

    ReplyDelete
  4. Wow, Tricia. I am at a loss for words ( and you know how unlikely that is).

    I am sending you some virtual hugs and well wishes because really? This whole thing you have been going through scares the living shit out of me.

    But I totally admire the strength you have exhibited. Totally.

    You are my hero, girlfriend.

    ReplyDelete
  5. You know what I said in my letter right? I'll always, always send you extra sunshine and positive vibes your way. It's not much and I know you can't buy anything with it, but I will not lose faith in this and hope all turns out for the better again. You will overcome this.

    Big big hugs.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Oh man, that's totally shitty. I can relate as I recently lost my job, though I don't quite need the medical help you do at the moment. I hope something hits soon, so you can get insured. I absolutely dread the medical in this country. That's another rant. Ha!

    ReplyDelete
  7. oh girlie, how 'bout this? in your picture you look hauntingly beautiful. really.

    my friend says as long as stuff can be fixed, we're good. so i'm wishing for fixing for you.

    xoxox
    jill

    ReplyDelete

Tell me how that made you feel. We are in the circle of trust.

Related Posts with Thumbnails