It's kind of like a Bucket List, but more fun. It's a list of people I'd like to punch or kick before I die. I was in a dreamy sort of mood when I wrote out my Bucket List. Now that I've quit smoking, it seemed like the appropriate time to make out this list.
She sings in baby talk while wearing a pink wig. Inexcusable.
Girls who makes the duck face for the camera
You don't look sexy, you look like dimwitted whores.
Because every child molester should be punched. Repeatedly.
*Don't worry, there are no other elderly people on my Fuck-It List...
Every guy who wears his pants sagging below a foot of exposed boxers
No explanation needed.
I paid thousands of dollars for my time with him and some sort of ROI would be appreciated.
The entire cast of Jersey Shore
Because those asshats get paid more money than I will make in a lifetime and I doubt they have a cumulative IQ of as much as Ronnie can bench press.
People with full carts who don't wave the person with three items ahead of them in line at the grocery store
First I'd like to punch you, then I'd like to punch your mother for raising such a rude person.
I realize I can't actually take on the entire IRS. Really, any employee will do.
My old landlord
You can't know how to speak English when rent is due, but forget how to speak it when shit is broken.
Integration is overrated, stay with your own kind. You go to McDonald's with your devil spawn and I'll go to the real restaurants.
You are not allowed to sing about love and heartbreak until you've grown your own pubic hair.
Every guy who has cheated on me
Because the nice guys I've dated have had to suffer the aftermath of your transgressions. This roundhouse is for them.
As much as I'd like to continue this list, I feel I ought to cut it off here. If it went on to itemize two hundred more folks I'd like to punch, you might begin to question my emotional stability.